Forget the Naysayers
And Come Original
Photo by Pawel Czerwinski on Unsplash
Note: though it’s quoted material, this article contains profanity.
Like everyone, I have a catalogue of favorite bands. I came of age in the late 90s and early 2000s, so, naturally, my musical tastes developed from the flavors of that time. I lean toward rock and metal, which seemed to capture and communicate my youthful rage and energy, as well as much of my angst and propensity to oscillate between existentialism and nihilism, long before I even knew they were legitimate branches of philosophy. (Don’t let me fool you with that description; I was a nice and well-behaved kid. Just a little moody and broody.)
It might seem predictable, even stereotypical of an American teenage boy in the late 90s, but some of my go-tos then and even now are Metallica, Rage, Linkin Park, Incubus, Staind—all really great for working out, by the way—but also to some lighter notes, like Dave and Tim, and Jack Johnson.
To be clear, there are plenty of others, and I continually look for new music to add, and new just means new to me; I have playlists going for each decade, from the 60s to now.
Side note:
I have a theorum about aging:
One of the hallmarks of aging is when we, one, stop acquiring new music, and two, when we stop listening to music altogether.
My all-time favorite band is 311.
311—pronounced “Three-Eleven”—is an unconventional band. They’ve been at it for more than 30 years and have maintained the same band members. I’ve heard them say in interviews that they’re probably the only band that doesn’t fight.
Their music is rooted in a fusion of rap and rock but also includes influence of reggae and funk. They have two lead vocalists, and both sing, rap, and they harmonize. Their library includes songs that can fall into just about any mainstream genre. Their first hit single was "Down" in 1995. The song that is probably most well-known is "Amber", and they have a crazy good cover of The Cure’s "Love Song".
One of 311’s most indelible and endearing qualities is that they are unapologetically, irrevocably, and wildly true to themselves, which has been a theme in their music since their inception. It’s as much as their operational logic as it is their moral philosophy.
In "Jackolantern’s Weather", from the Blue Album (1995), Nick Hexum, one of the singers, sings and raps about literary devices and grammar. Yes, grammar.
Speaking of “Jackolantern’s Weather”: I always say what I feel and that is a promise / Nothing in life is above being honest.
Soundsystem’s (1999) “Come Original” is exactly about being themselves.
In Uplifter’s (2009) “Jackpot”: That we made up ourselves / That's to be the 311'est.
On the Blue Album, their second studio album, the second single, after “Down” is “All Mixed Up”. The intro and pre-chorus is:
You've got to trust your instinct
And let go of regret
You've got to bet on yourself now, Star
'Cause that's your best bet
Watch me now with a wicked and wild and I said
We come with the funky style that gets us known for the show
And we'll mix the hip-hop reggae if we say it is so
And fuck the naysayers 'cause they don't mean a thing
'Cause this is what style we bring
And fuck the naysayers ‘cause they don't mean a thing.
311 has never worried about image or commerciality. They do their thing and love doing it, which may explain why they persist while countless other bands have their blips on music radars and then disappear into oblivion.
I’m sure you’ve seen an artist, or any person in your circles for that matter, either at work or school, even in your family, and you’ve thought to yourself: that person is trying way too hard.
That is, they’re trying too hard in the wrong ways. Pretentious ways. Style over substance. Chasing kewlness at the expense of originality and authenticity.
Such messages from 311 came to me during those formative years when it’s most important to hear them. I embraced whatever nerdiness and geekiness I was into at any given time and didn’t much care what others thought. Some days I was playing chess and learning a Dave Matthews song on guitar (shout out to Bang). Other days I was jamming punk rock songs with one of my friends and watching hockey fights and MMA fights (shout out to Mike). Other days still I was hitting the weights all by my lonesome.
Hard pivot #1:
The Miss Texas USA beauty pageant took place on June 24, 2024, and one of the contestants was Marissa Teijo, who is no ordinary participant. Apparently, the rules were recently changed to be more inclusive, and Marissa wouldn’t have been able to compete without such changes. In addition to some of these rules, Marissa is also now known as being the oldest woman to participate in the pageant, at 71.
Someone pointed out to me some of the condescending trolls on the socials—err, negative reactions—to a woman of a certain age participating in a beauty pageant.
First, anyone who gets up on any stage or on any platform—you know, like, in real life—no matter how beloved or reviled, has a degree of courage. It’s not easy to stand up and have the spotlight on you in front of any number of strangers.
Then, to get on a stage, platform, a ring or athletic field and compete is exponentially more difficult. Every eyeball is scrutinizing every imperfection of every action you take, and everyone’s going to enlighten you about it. Marissa is probably well acquainted with this aspect of the spotlight. She competed in bodybuilding 30 years ago but continues adhering to her fitness regimen, and now models regularly.
Hard pivot #2, but bear with me:
In his book on maximizing healthspan throughout our natural lifespan, Outlive, Peter Attia describes a person’s Marginal Decade of life, the final decade, typified by a sharp decline in physical strength and cognition, the growing inability to perform activities of daily living, as well as dealing with one or more of the Four Horsemen of disease: metabolic disfunction and syndrome, cancer, heart disease, and neurodegenerative diseases, to which we’ll eventually succumb.
The marginal decade and the typical frailty and diseases don’t drop out of the sky and hit us like a meteor. It’s a slow burn, a lifelong slow burn. If we do a thought experiment and sort of logically reverse engineer these outcomes, the seeds are probably implanted in utero, as we all absorb whatever our moms eat, thereby affecting gene expression, but it really hits its stride when we get off the baby food and get onto a diet of ultra processed foods.
Obviously, the ill effects start as overweight, which we now see among large swaths of kids. According to the NIH, more than 20% of teens—that’s about 1 in 5—are clinically obese [1]. And about the same number of all youths—under 18—had high cholesterol in a study the CDC published in 2015 [2]. Apart from overweight and obesity, there are no other visible symptoms until something may start showing up in a blood panel, but how many kids get annual bloodwork? And even if nothing abnormal appears then, it doesn’t mean that we aren’t initiating diseases that may not have symptoms or measurable effects for twenty or thirty years.
About 70% of American adults are overweight or obese [3]. In 2021, almost 100 million American were measurably pre-diabetic, including almost 33 million 18 to 44-year-olds [4]. An estimated 37 million Americans have chronic kidney disease, but 9 out of 10 people aren’t even aware of it due to it being asymptomatic [5]. In 2010, 60-70 million Americans were affected by digestive diseases [6].
There’s a lot of overlap with these populations. It’s actually uncommon that a person has only one disease or condition, even if they’re not aware of the presence of another. If there’s one thing I’ve learned in my studies of nutrition and physical fitness, it’s that like-things tend to cluster together. Positive things tend to coalesce, and negative things tend to coagulate. Like attracts like.
The culmination of the negative really starts becoming visible for most people as early as the late 30s and early 40s—midlife—but it's that last decade where the consequences of inattention to our health seem to exponentially manifest. Again, it doesn’t happen spontaneously, and the fact that there are so few symptoms of these diseases until there’s serious progression is one thing that makes it all so insipid. It’s almost diabolical.
Repivot to Pivot #1:
At an age when most people are likely entering into their marginal decade, Marissa Teijo has the energy and look of a fit woman one-third of her age. Seeing her on stage, it’s clear that she had a blast competing in the Miss Texas beauty pageant. She’s taken her health and fitness seriously and has done so consistently for a long time.
She’s the kind of role model we need, and we should all thank our lucky stars if we make it to that age and have any degree of health, wellness, and physical fitness, which we can and will if we consistently work at it, as she shows us.
Instead of that being everyone’s response, there are plenty of keyboard warriors who think that Marissa is somehow out of line for living her best life. It’s a special combo of ageism, misogyny, and chauvinism (yep—it’s a lot of men). Marissa’s happy, and, really, I think that’s what rubs some people the wrong way. Misery loves company—like attracts like— and there’s an abundance of it, unfortunately.
Whatever you want to do, learn, become, improve, or be—just go do it. Have fun. Enjoy it. Be your best. It’s never too late to start. I was pushing 40 when I figured out how to eat for health, satiety, and satisfaction, which allowed me to resolve my lifelong dysfunctional relationship with food and my disordered eating. I’m a much happier person on this side of it, and I would argue that that benefits everyone around me, even if it’s in small, seemingly insignificant ways.
As they say, haters gonna hate. This seems to be just as true in regard to health and fitness as anything else. Remember that haters are projecting their own insecurities, sense of inferiority, and lack of accomplishment. Happy and healthy people simply don’t behave like haters.
We should all endeavor to lift others up instead of kicking them down.
Still, if you ever find yourself faced in such a situation, confronting a hater, remember 311’s mantra, operational logic, and moral philosophy:
Fuck the naysayers cause they don't mean a thing.
